Tag: Anxiety

Overcoming OCD: Letting Go of the Rope

Posted in OCD General, OCD Coping Strategies, OCD Awareness Week, Mental Health, OCDTagged , , , , , , , , , 2 Comments

I have had OCD for what is fast coming up to 30 years. As I quickly approach my 41st birthday it can sometimes feel like I’ve been fighting a war inside my brain for what feels like forever.  I’ve read all the books, listened to the podcasts, had a couple of rounds of therapy, trained as a yoga teacher and PT, I look after my nutritional and physical health, and choose to share what I’ve learnt in the hope of helping others through my blog, Instagram posts and workshops. 

So why I ask myself do I still struggle at times?  Why does the world still feel overwhelming & why won’t my nervous system just relax already? 

Maybe my expectations are too high?  I had a therapist once say to me that I might just have to ‘accept the fact that I’m an anxious person’, not really what you want to hear but then expecting to find total inner peace is probably a little unrealistic too I realise.     

I know Steven Phillipson says, ‘I don’t care how you feel, continue with your day aligning to your values’ and I try to do this. It is in fact how I’ve managed to achieve everything I have over the last 10 years but I do sometimes wonder how much noise is normal?

I wrote in a post a while back: ‘When we have OCD, Fight-or-flight can turn into a trait instead of a temporary state!’ and this is how I feel, like I’m stuck in fight or flight most of the time. My ability to relax, be in the moment and not feel overwhelmed is seriously lacking.    

I feel like I’ve been on a mission the last few years for answers – which I now realise may be a sneaky compulsion of mine, eek!   Maybe what I should have been doing is letting go of the rope – another ACT metaphor which I love.

This ACT metaphor illustrates how struggling against your obsessions (the monster) is a never-ending fight, but Letting go of the rope and not engaging with your intrusive thoughts, accepting the presence of them and carrying on with your life while aligning to you values is your way to freedom. 

Breaking it down a bit further:

  • The Monster: Represents your OCD obsessions.
  • The Rope: Represents your attempts to control, avoid, or eliminate these obsessions with compulsions.
  • The Pit: Represents the fear of being consumed by, or drowning in your obsessions.
  • Letting Go: Means dropping the rope (not completing the compulsions) and ceasing the battle, not necessarily defeating the monster (obsession). 

We need to recognise that fighting our obsessions is exhausting and ultimately ineffective, allowing our difficult thoughts and feelings to be present without fighting them is the key, this then frees up energy and attention to focus on what actually matters. 

I wonder then have I secretly been pulling on that rope and keeping my OCD alive with all my research and development?  Argh! Does it all actually come down to my inability to just stop and sit with the feelings?

As I head towards my 30 year anniversary with OCD, I need to acknowledge that some education with OCD is important but then try to recognise where the line is between being informed and it being a compulsion.  

Have you got any sneaky defaults which are keeping your OCD alive and kicking? Do you feel like you’re doing everything right but you’re still struggling too?  

Maybe try and keep a list this week, whenever you notice yourself doing something unnecessary because of your OCD, write it down, awareness is the first step to being able to change these traits, which we have unknowingly accepted into our lives. 

On a more positive note and bringing some hope back into the conversation. I do have the odd occasion when I come out of fight or flight and it feels so wonderful.  It feels like what life should be, I’m present, in the moment and experiencing life as it could be, full of opportunity and joy.  

If I have one target for the next 40 years it’s to spend as much time as possible out of fight or flight and if I can achieve this I will be a very happy soul. I want to be able to enjoy life without rushing through it, listen when people talk, take joy in the small things and the process of getting to them.      

Let me know if any of this resonates with you.  It can be very lonely at times to have OCD, and community can help us feel that less.
A bit of a heartfelt one this week as I approach that 30 year milestone but sometimes that’s what’s needed.

As always, you are not alone,
Stay Strong xxx

Understanding OCD Through Relational Framework Theory

Posted in Mental Health, Mental Wellbeing, OCD, OCD GeneralTagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

Does this sound familiar?

You’re out enjoying your day, you feel happy, in fact you feel really good and then all of a sudden out of no where you get hit with an OCD obsession.  ‘Ugh you think, why now when I was having so much fun and feeling so happy?’    

Why indeed?

Well there’s a theory to why this happens and it’s called, ‘relational framework theory’ in fact it’s what ACT – acceptance commitment therapy – is built upon.

I’m sure I’m not going to be as good as the creators at explaining how it works so please go look up Steven C. Hayes if you have a chance but the theory is based upon the concept that humans think relationally. 

This basically means that humans can and do relate objects in their environment to other objects. Virtually in any possible way e.g. same as, better than, opposite of, greater than, faster than, part of, similar to or like, before and after, if/then, family relationships, near and far etc,
There are all sorts of ways in which we sort and link information in our minds and it has been amazing for our evolutionary progress however it also opens us up to the possibility of immense suffering.   

Lets dig a little deeper

As we grow as humans, we create vast networks of relationships in our brains.  We link objects together so we are better able to make sense of them and recall them when needed. 

Ever found that when learning something new if you can relate it to or build upon something you already know it’s far easier to remember?  Or when you try and recall someone’s name it can help to remember where you know them from? 

This is because your brain has linked ‘Julie from the gym’, with the gym in your head, therefore remembering the gym will help you recall Julie’s name. 

Julie from the gym might also have other connections such as she has a daughter who goes to the same school you used to attend or maybe she likes to play netball and so does your friend Jane – Jane and Julie will now be linked in your mental framework too.

Here’s a little game you can play to help demonstrate this further:

Write down one noun – any type of object or animal will do

Noun 1 _________________________

Now write down a second noun

Noun 2________________

Now answer the following 3 questions:

  1. How is the first noun related to the second one?
  2. How is the first noun better than the second one?
  3. How is the first one the parent of the second one? 

The third one can take a bit longer but given a bit of time an answer will come.

This exercise highlights how the brain can relate anything to anything else!!!!!!!  It is an interesting insight as ultimately not everything can be the parent of everything; however, the brain justifies these relations by features it abstracts from the related facts. Your mind can always find a justification for that relation!  Sound similar to OCD?

Bringing us back then to OCD and the start of this post.

We can see how obsessions (unwanted, intrusive, and distressing thoughts, images, urges, or feelings that repeatedly enter a person’s mind and cause significant anxiety.) can become linked to events, people, places, circumstances, actions, words, smells, music/sounds etc.

The obsession, whatever it is, can become attached to an existing relational framework in our brain, triggering our OCD every time we then come into contact with that object or framework in the future!

‘ARGH!!!!!!!!!’

Does this sound familiar? 

Can you think of any frameworks that OCD has latched onto?  Maybe something in your bedtime routine, perhaps when you cook a meal and get the knives out, maybe when left on your own with your kids, perhaps when the news comes on, or it could be when you get into your car, the things OCD can attach itself onto are literally endless.

And unfortunately, once it has attached itself, as far as I’m aware, there’s no easy way to unattach it again.

Having an awareness of this is so important for OCD recovery because we have to accept that we are going to get triggered, and if we fight it, push it away or try and block it out, it just makes it stronger and even more sticky.  You can’t unravel these networks they are too vast and convoluted.    

So what can we do?

We have to let go of the struggle.

There’s a lovely ACT metaphor which illustrates this nicely

Someone is standing in a battlefield fighting a war. The war is not going well.  The person fights harder and harder.  Losing is a devasting option, but unless the war is won the person fighting it thinks that living a worthwhile life will be impossible. So the war goes on. 
Unknown to this person however is that at any time they can quit the battlefield and begin to live life now.  The war may still go on and the battlefield may still be visible. The terrain may look very much as it did while the fighting was happening but the outcome of the war is no longer very important and the seemingly logical sequence, of having to win the war before beginning to really live has been abandoned. – Extract Taken from: Get out of your mind and into your life by Steven C. Hayes. 

Here we see that the way to move forward is to stop fighting, accept the obsession and carry on with our lives aligning to our values.  Eventually the brain sees the link to the framework as unimportant and stops bringing your attention to it so readily, however every now and then it will throw it back up to check if its important and it’s your job at this point to say:

‘thank you brain that’s exactly what I wanted to hear right now’

and then carry on with your day aligning to your values – for more information on values work check out my post here.


If you’re enjoying learning more about ACT therapy then I would highly recommend looking up Steven C. Hayes, which is who a lot of these ideas have come from. 

A small thank you at the end of this one for your ongoing support, this is my 100th blog post and definitely something which should be celebrated.

As always, Stay Strong xxx

ACT Metaphors for OCD Recovery

Posted in Anxiety, Mental Health, Mental Wellbeing, OCD, OCD Coping Strategies, OCD GeneralTagged , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

I’ve written a lot recently about how when we have OCD, if we give into our compulsions we are likely to be plunged into our sympathetic (fight or flight) nervous system.   

This is an issue as when in this state we are unable to think rationally and our intrusive thoughts can feel all overwhelming. 

There are some great ACT metaphors which we can use to illustrate this concept, below are 3 of my favourites, let me know which one’s yours:

1. The fog

When an OCD thought comes in imagine it like fog being blown towards you.  You have the choice, at this stage, to not participate, let the thought be and wait for the fog to dissipate or you can give into the compulsion.  Every time you give into the compulsion, whatever it may be, imagine a new layer of fog being blown towards you, further damping your ability to see clearly.

2.Ripples on a pond

Here the OCD obsession is like a stone being thrown into a pond.  If we do nothing and let it be the ripples will soon disperse and we will be able to see clearly again. If however we give into the compulsion it’s the equivalent of throwing a new stone in every time.

3.The bus stop

Here we see that before we are triggered we are standing at the bus stop watching the traffic go by.  If we then get triggered and give into the compulsion it is the equivalent of walking out into the road and being surrounded by the traffic, therefore not being able to see clearly.

There are plenty more of these metaphors out there, if you’ve found these ones helpful why not have a look around for some others or if you know of another helpful one then add it in the comments below, I’d love to hear it. 

I do think the metaphors can make it all seem very easy to just draw yourself back out of fight or flight. I don’t for a second want to belittle how hard this is to do when you’re in it, believe me I know, but it can help to show what the effect of giving into an OCD compulsion can be and hopefully it gives you another tool and incentive to not give into those compulsions when they come along, they really do only lead to misery. 

I really hope it helps, as always remember you are not alone.
Stay Strong xxx 

Conquering OCD: 10 things EVERYONE should know about thoughts!

Posted in OCD, OCD GeneralTagged , , , , , , , , 1 Comment

Here are some useful things to know about thoughts that EVERYONE should be taught at school – it would honestly save us so much time and energy.

1.Thoughts are mostly random – don’t believe me? Then grab a piece of paper, a pen & a timer. Start your timer for 3 minutes, place your pen at one side of the paper, close your eyes and start drawing a line. Every time your train of thought changes, change direction on the page. After 3 minutes see what you’ve got, my bet is it’s not a straight line.

2. Everyone gets intrusive thoughts – it’s a normal human condition. I wrote a post on this a few years back, you can read it here.  

3. We get over 60,000 thoughts a day – do you really think you’re controlling them?

4. It’s not the thought that’s the issue – the thoughts come in randomly most of the time and if we can just let it be, it’ll float on out again too. The brain will realise we’re not interested in it and move on. It’s the attention & meaning we give to the thoughts when they come in that causes the problem! 

5. You can’t outthink your thoughts – there will always be another, ‘what if?’ or ‘Maybe?’.  Logic is limited but imagination is not.  Think of logic like the size of the earth and your imagination as the universe, you cannot logic yourself out of an OCD intrusive thought – trust me I’ve tried! 

6. Your brain has a filter – its called the reticular activating system (RAS), it draws your attention to what it thinks is important to you and filters out everything else!!!  It works this out by seeing what you focus your attention on – see how this can be an issue in OCD? No blog post on this one but I have don’t an Instagram video which you can view here.

7. The OCD themes are irrelevant – the subject of your thoughts doesn’t matter! It’s your inability to sit with doubt and uncertainty that’s the problem.  If you’ve had OCD for a while it may have changed themes once or twice over the years.  This is called ‘whack a mole’ and it highlights that it’s not actually the thought but the associated feeling of doubt that you struggle with.  

8. Most of our thoughts are about the past or the future – we are rarely in the present moment, where anxiety doesn’t exist.  This isn’t our fault; our brains top priority is to keep us safe and one of the ways it does this is to analyse the past to try and predict the future.  It also likes to run through different potential future scenarios to see how they might turn out for us – a very useful tool if used wisely and can even be fun when imagining happy outcomes but with our unlimited imaginations & OCD this can quickly turn into an activity which can cause us immense distress. 

9. At night the prefrontal cortex takes a rest, and the more primal ‘chimp’ brain takes over – don’t take anything your brain tells you between 11pm and 5am seriously.  How often have you been awake in the middle of the night worrying about something and then in the morning you wonder what all the fuss was about? Everything feels harder at night and this is why! I’ve also done an Instagram video on this one here.

10. We think mostly about ourselves – we’re actually quite egocentric- this however tends to cause us distress, especially if the thoughts are of a intrusive nature, remember: ‘Overthinking only leads to unhappiness’. Try thinking about yourself less and others more, you’ll be happier! 

    In summary

    • Our thoughts are mostly random
    • Everyone gets intrusive thoughts – it’s a normal human condition. 
    • We get over 60,000 thoughts a day – do you really think you’re controlling them?
    • It’s not the thought that’s the issue – it’s the attention & meaning we give it! 
    • You can’t outthink your thoughts – there will always be another, ‘what if?’ or ‘Maybe?’.  Logic is limited but imagination is not.    
    • Your brain has a filter (RAS), it draws your attention to what it thinks is important to you and filters out everything else!!!
    • OCD themes are irrelevant – the subject doesn’t matter; it’s your inability to sit with uncertainty that’s the problem.
    • Most of our thoughts are about the past or the future, we are rarely in the present moment – where anxiety doesn’t exist. 
    • At night the prefrontal cortex takes a rest, and the more primal ‘chimp’ brain takes over – don’t take anything your brain tells you between 11pm and 5am seriously.
    • Most of our thoughts are about ourselves, this causes us stress, try thinking of others more.

      I’ve learnt a lot of the above from my extensive reading and research into psychology and well-being literature, I share a lot of these ideas with my students in my anxiety workshops. It’s nice to see them all summarised here in a helpful way.
      I really hope they help you as much as they have me.

      As always, you are not alone,
      Stay Strong xxx

    Resilience in OCD: Why the holidays can be hard

    Posted in OCD, OCD GeneralTagged , , , , , , 1 Comment

    OCD recovery can be tough; in fact it’s very rarely a straight line.  Some days we feel like we can conquer the world and ‘why was I even worried about that thought’ and the next day, that same thought, can be all consuming! 

    Does this sound familiar? 

    I believe it has a lot to do with our nervous system, which is like the software of our body.  Everyday it’s impacted by our day-today routine, which in turn has an effect on our resilience levels, which directly impacts how well we can manage OCD thoughts when they pop in.   

    Our brain sits at the top of our nervous system and its number one job is to keep us alive.  It really doesn’t care if you’re living your best life or not, it just wants you alive.

    As a result, the brain likes predictable routines, to know what’s coming next and anything out of this remit can upset our resilience levels. 

    A prime example of being out of routine is holiday season.  Not only does a lot of the day-to-day structure disappear but most likely we’re moving less, eating worse, drinking more, potentially sleep is also disrupted, not to mention you may also be staying away from home.  All this is dysregulating for the nervous system, as a result we can get more easily stuck in our sympathetic nervous system (fight or flight). 

    Why does this matter? 

    The autonomic nervous system (ANS) has two main branches: –

    Sympathetic – fight or flight
    and
    Parasympathetic – rest and digest.

    Our resilience levels depend on how easily we can move between these two states.

    When our resilience levels are low our nervous system can get “stuck” in fight/flight.  When they’re high, our nervous system can activate fight/flight when needed (getting up in the morning/running for a bus) but then returns to rest and digest efficiently afterwards. 

    This flexibility is called autonomic regulation.  Can you take a guess what our resilience levels are like when our routine disappears? And in turn how well we are able to manage OCD thoughts when they occur?

    A great analogy for this is: The threat bucket

    The water level is your resilience level at the start of the day – and it will depend on how safe your brain feels. 

    The arrows going in are your daily additional stresses – some days these will be less and the bucket wont overflow, other days they’ll be coming in so quickly you can’t keep up, if your bucket overflows you’re moving into fight or flight.

    Note: if you have OCD it’s likely that your base line water level will already be higher to start with and if you’re ruminating throughout the day it’s a bit like having a hose filling that bucket up with a steady drip, drip, drip. 

    Taking this metaphor a bit further we can release some of this built-up stress with the tap at the bottom of the bucket.  This is where all the self-care and routine comes in, those little daily habits which lead up to big results, or in this case resilience. 

    Routine can be incredibly important in OCD recovery as it improves our resilience levels allowing us to deal with obsessions (intrusive thoughts) more easily – remember those days when you’re able to dismiss that same thought that kept you caught a pervious day?  Those are the days your resilience is high and you’re not suck in fight or flight.    

    Routine including: good nutrition, sleep, movement, social connection and relaxation are unbelievably important for recovery maintenance.  This is why I’m a PT, I’ve had to force myself to live the lifestyle I know does me good.  The brain and body automatically seek comfort but this is not what keeps us healthy, especially when we’re dealing with mental health issues. 

    If you know you find the holidays hard then it can be so helpful to prepare some support in advance, where you can try and keep some elements of your routine in place.  Maybe drink a little less, take a walk after dinner, make sure you have a good meal, including protein, before you start on the sugary treats, have someone you can talk to if it gets tough, write down the things you know help and refer back to them if OCD hits. 

    I did just this and it really helped me out over the last few days, remember when you’re in fight or flight it’s very hard to think rationally so you want everything in place and ready beforehand.  If you’re not sure where to start then comment ‘FOUNDATIONS’ in the comments below and I’ll send you a link to one of my foundations trackers to get you get started.   

    I’m going to follow this post up with a more detailed look at what happens when that bucket overflows, so don’t forget to subscribe.

    Remember, you are not alone,
    Stay Strong xxx

    Understanding Thought-Action Fusion in OCD

    Posted in Mental Health, Mental Wellbeing, OCD, OCD GeneralTagged , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

    Thought-action-fusion is a common cognitive distortion associated with OCD.  It’s where a person believes that having a thought is equivalent to performing an action, or that thinking something makes it more likely to happen.

    It is a very important distortion to be aware of if you’re suffering from OCD as when you’re in fight or flight mode – talked about in my previous post – anything can feel possible.     

    Remember when we are suffering from OCD we are highly likely to be in the fight or flight (sympathetic) part of our nervous system. When in fight or flight our ability to think rationally goes out of the window and so things that we know to be impossible, when in our rational minds, can feel possible! 

    When struggling and ruminating on an OCD obsession the brain and body are suffering with high stress (fight or flight), when in this state our memory becomes selective and fragmented.  Our attention narrows (tunnel vision) and our hippocampus (memory organiser) works less efficiently.

    The result of this is that we can get gaps in our memory, Out-of-order recall and confusion about timelines. In addition to this the brain searches for danger-related memories, and the Safe or neutral memories are harder to access. 

    It’s important to note that a Strong memory ≠ accurate memory.  Stress increases confidence in memory and emotional intensity but decreases, detail accuracy, context and perspective! 

    All this results in intrusive memories feeling more real because they’re emotionally tagged

    • “What if” thoughts feel urgent due to amygdala activation
    • Memory distrust develops (“What if I forgot something important?”)

    This fuels checking, reassurance, and rumination.

    For me this was one of the most enlightening distortions to learn about.  Following my nervous breakdown, I was constantly in my sympathetic nervous system and so I had a few events when an intrusive thought occurred, and I couldn’t remember clearly/rationalise it/work it out, this caused me unbelievable distress. 

    Thought-action-fusion can make you feel like a thought is real and because of your mental state your inability to rationalise that distortion feeds the uncertainty.  We need to recognise this pattern when it happens for what it is and reduce the impact by:

    • Not trying to ‘figure it out’ while anxious – this includes during the night, no analysis between 11pm and 5am remember! 
    • Remembering that you’re in fight-or-flight, you’ll be thinking in extremes and this is not evidence.
    • Find ways to reset and come back into the parasympathetic nervous system (rest and digest). 

    I really love Byron Katies method for this where we say:
    Is it true?
    Is it 100% true? 

    If the answer to the second question is no – which it will be because the stress is based on doubt and uncertainty, then ‘you have to let it go’.   

    Why would you torture yourself over anything less than 100% certainty? 

    Fear lives in the vague after all and it’s my guess, it’s just a thought (obsession), attached to a feeling of uncertainty, that you’re basing your rumination on, not facts. 

    Your brain is probably desperately trying to work out whether there is something genuine to be concerned about, you should take this as your sign that there isn’t!   

    I really hope this helps, OCD recovery isn’t easy and sometimes thought-action-fusion can get worse when we are in recovery and start to let our guard down, but know and trust who you are and as always,

    Stay Strong xxx

    Why OCD Compulsions Make it Worse!

    Posted in Mental Health, OCD, OCD GeneralTagged , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

    If you’ve landed here, you probably already know a bit about OCD but in case you don’t here are the Cliff notes.

    OCD stands for: Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. 

    Obsessions are: unwanted, intrusive, and distressing thoughts, images, urges, or feelings that repeatedly enter a person’s mind and cause significant anxiety. 

    The resulting compulsion is a repetitive behaviour or mental act that a person feels driven to perform in response to the obsession. 

    Todays blog is all about why the compulsion part of OCD is not helpful for us. 

    When you have OCD completing a compulsion, whatever it may be, is done out of a need to neutralise the obsession in some way. 

    Examples of compulsions include; driving back round to check that a bump in the road wasn’t a person.  Washing your hands more than once to make sure they’re clean.  Going back to check if the oven is off, or that the doors are all locked and secure. 

    There are in fact endless examples, and we’re all slightly different which can make OCD a very tricky beast to catch. 

    It can be hard at times not to complete a compulsion, especially if we feel responsible for others safety but I’ve found that by invalidating the supposed ‘safety guarantee’ of the compulsion, the need to do it disappears as well. We start to see it as pointless – because it is, read on to see why.

    How do I know if it’s an OCD compulsion?

    The real clue to whether it’s an OCD compulsion or not, is that when it’s OCD it’s normally accompanied by distress.  Afterall if we don’t mind the compulsive action, then is it an issue?

    People with OCD are normally fighting an inner battle where they are trying to work out the doubt and uncertainty they are feeling – impossible by the way – and compulsions such as checking or ruminating can feel like a productive way to do this.  Well, I’m here today to confirm to you that IT IS NOT. 

    We feel like the compulsions are’ ‘helping us’ and ‘keeping us safe’ but they’re doing the complete opposite, yep you heard it right, they are making everything worse!

    Now I’m not a qualified therapist but I know from years of experience that as soon as you give into one of those compulsions, you are validating the faulty signal coming from the amygdala and telling the brain that there is something to worry about.  You’re basically saying,

    ‘hey brain, this is important, you need to be on high alert and focus all your attention on this obsession’.    

    By doing this you are putting yourself into your Sympathetic Nervous System, more commonly known as fight or flight.  Once in this state you will not be thinking rationally. The logical brain switches off and passes everything over to the more primal survival part of the brain. This part of the brain is all about keeping you safe and you’ve just told it, by giving into the compulsion, that there’s something it needs to worry about. 

    Basically you’ve just started to fall down the rabbit hole.  I told you last time, he might look fluffy but he’s a whole lot of trouble!

    When in fight or flight you cannot think rationally and so you are in a state where the brain can convince you black is white, up is down and left is right – things you know to be impossible!  You are not able to reason or be sensible in any way in this state and giving into an OCD compulsion puts you in this state.

    How do you know when you’ve reached this state?  It can be hard when you’re in it to know but I like Martha Becks phrase:

    ‘If you’re struggling, you’re spiralling’

    basically if it’s causing you distress then you can be pretty sure you’re in fight or flight. 

    At this point you need to step away and reset.  Say ‘thank you brain, that’s exactly what I wanted to hear right now’ and carry on with your day aligning with your values.

    More tips on how to do this coming next week, so don’t forget to subscribe below!  

    In summary, compulsions are pointless because:   

    • As soon as we complete a compulsion, we validate the faulty signal aka the obsession. 
    • This then takes us into fight or flight – as we we’ve just told the brain there’s something to be worried about
    • Once this happens, we can’t think rationally
    • This cycle is self perpetuating.

    I have illustrated it below to make it clear.

    Hopefully you can now see why completing compulsions is COMPLETELY POINTLESS!!!!

    I really hope this helps, let me know in the comments below.
    As always, Stay Strong xxx

    The Role of Values in Overcoming OCD

    Posted in Mental Wellbeing, OCD, OCD Awareness Week, OCD Coping Strategies, OCD GeneralTagged , , , , , , , , , 1 Comment

    I’ve mentioned values in several posts to date, and I feel it’s time to take a closer at them and why they are so important in OCD recovery. 

    What’s a value anyway? 

    Lets start at the beginning, a value is: ‘a principle or standard of behaviour; one’s judgement of what is important in life’.

    They are the standards we set for ourselves to live by, they outline the things that are most important to us and help guide us with our daily choices. 

    If you’ve done any ACT (acceptance commitment thearpy), then you will know that values work is one of the 6 core principles

    They describe values as something you, ‘do’ rather than ‘have’. They are verbs not nouns, general directions and guiders for life, a place you can never arrive at but are always striving towards.  

    From this description they can feel quite nebulous, but they are the invisible building blocks of our lives. 

    How do you work out your values?

    There are lots of great exercises online that you can work through.  Here are a couple of links to try but a quick google will find you lots of information on the topic.

    Values worksheet 1

    Values worksheet 2

    If you’ve never done this work before then I advise spending a bit of time working through one of the above activities. 

    So why are values so important in OCD recovery? 

    They become especially useful when you are struggling because you can align to your values and know that that’s the person you want to be. 

    You can then take actions towards your values, regardless of the thoughts and how you feel, which is exactly what we need to do when OCD gets loud.

    OCD has a nasty habit of making you think you’re the worst person in the world, capable of distressing and horrible things and when you’re spiralling it can be incredibly hard to pull yourself out.

    Your values then become a superpower, acting as your anchor during these difficult times.  They remind you of who you truly want to be and allow you to proactively take action to align with them. 

    Say for example that your values are to be an honest, trustworthy, reliable, kind and loving person, then when OCD is telling you otherwise you have the opportunity to say;

    ‘No OCD, I’m not who you’re telling me I am, I know my values and I’m going to carry on with my day aligning to them’. 

    The brain believes what it sees, so if you live your life aligning to your values then you will be banking undisputable evidence of who you are. The OCD thoughts then become much easier to dismiss and don’t take hold as easily. 

    In addition to this it’s worth remembering here that OCD thoughts are ego-dystonic, which refers to the fact that the obsessions and compulsions are inconsistent with a person’s values, beliefs, and self-image, understandably causing a lot of distress.  

    When going through OCD therapy and recovery it can feel so tough at times and your values can act as your guiding light through the darkness. 

    Every time it feels overwhelming and tough, you need to remind yourself of your values and ask yourself;

    ‘If I’m aligning with my values and the person I want to be then what would I do in this situation?’  

    • Would I drive back and check if that bump in the road was a person or would I carry on with my day?
    • Would I wash my hands again because they still feel dirty or would I just carry on with my day?
    • Would I spend hours ruminating over the nightmare I had last night and not make it into work, or would I just carry on with my day?

    There are endless scenarios you could use here but ultimately you have to ask yourself, is your OCD holding you back from the values-based life you want to live? 

    I’m guessing the answer is yes.   

    The amazing thing about doing values work, is that once they’re in place they allow your life to become more focused and meaningful in all ways.  You become empowered to let anything that doesn’t align with them go, which quite often results in a lot less drama, mental health struggles and a lot more peace.

    I’d love to know if you have also found ACT therapy and Values work helpful in your OCD recovery, please share your insights below.

    As always,
    Stay Strong xxx

    Why Habituation is key to OCD Recovery

    Posted in Mental Health, OCD, OCD Awareness Week, OCD GeneralTagged , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

    Last week I posted about choice and why it’s so important in OCD recovery.  Towards the end of that post, I mentioned habituation and I felt the topic so significant for me in my recovery that it deserved it’s own post, so here we are.

    What is habituation?

    According to google it is:

    ‘the process of making or becoming accustomed or used to something.’

    In Psychology specifically it’s:

    ‘the diminishing of an innate response to a frequently repeated stimulus.’

    When applying this to OCD specifically:

    We can see ‘the innate response’ as the compulsion and ‘the repeated stimulus’ as the obsession. 

    Applying habituation to OCD recovery

    We learn in therapy that everyone gets intrusive thoughts and so the aim in OCD recovery is not to get rid of the thoughts (obsessions) but to see them as completely irrelevant. 

    We do this by recognising the trigger (obsession) when it comes in and habituating (getting used) to it, so that we no longer feel the need to complete the compulsion – whether it be mental or physical. 

    This was a big turning point for me, realising that the obsession is something you can ‘get used to’.  The result of this is that the brain eventually no longer brings your attention to it – as it starts to see it as insignificant. 

    For a long time I saw OCD recovery as not having the obsessions but now I see that it’s my reaction to the obsession that is the key.  I have no control over whether the thought/image/whatever appears or not only my reaction to it.

    The Reticular Activating system and habituation

    You only have so much mental capacity each day and the brain has an unbelievably effective filtering system called the reticular activating system or RAS for short. 

    According to Jim Kwik’s book Limitless,

    ‘every second your senses gather up to 11 million bits of information from the world around you…
    …the conscious mind typically processes only 50 bits per second. ’

    ‘(The RAS) also acts as the gatekeeper of information through a process called habituation, which allows the brain to ignore meaningless and repetitive stimuli’  

    So the brain takes in an unbelievable amount of information every second and then decides what it’s going to bring to your attention and what it’s going to discard, mostly down to what you’re telling it you feel is important!

    When you are struggling with OCD and you see the obsessions as important the brain will prioritise these thoughts above all others. Once you start to habituate yourself to the OCD triggers the brain will no longer use its finite resources on information you’re telling it is irrelevant.  It will file it as a ‘meaningless and repetitive stimuli’ and no longer bring it to your attention.

    Yes, this is habituation and it’s where OCD recovery happens!   

    A note here to highlight that we shouldn’t expect our obsessions never to show up again.  Every now and then the brain will throw one to the forefront of your mind and say,  ‘Remember this?  You were really obsessed with this at one point, is it still important?’ and your only job is to do absolutely nothing.  This is how we break free from OCD. 

    In summary, we need to habituate to our obsessions, show the brain that they’re insignificant and carry on with our day aligning with our values. This is how we live our lives in recovery. 

    Not sure on your values? Then be sure to subscribe below as that’s what next weeks post is going to be all about.

    As always,
    Stay Strong xxx 

    Overcoming OCD: The Power of Choice

    Posted in Mental Health, Mental Wellbeing, OCD, OCD Awareness Week, OCD GeneralTagged , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

    I have recently had the pleasure of coming across the choice article written by Dr Steven Phillipson – a licensed clinical psychologist who specialises in Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy for OCD.  It’s such an extraordinary piece of work and a must read for anyone suffering from OCD.  It is quite lengthy but there is an audio version here.

    The focus of the article is how we need to see OCD thoughts as irrelevant and that we DO have a choice when it comes to this decision.

    I know only too well when you have OCD you can feel like you have no choice but to do the compulsion when the thoughts come in, the doubt & uncertainty that comes with not knowing 100% whether the thought is significant can feel too much to bear. 

    However, we need to start to see this part of the brain as an independent system from our conscious thoughts, one that works automatically – like the systems which control automatic functioning in the body such as breathing and heartrate.  We do this by becoming aware of our automatic thoughts and autopilot, making the choice to carry on with our day, align with our values and see the thoughts as meaningless and irrelevant – because they are.  

    Below is a quote from the article which I thought was helpful:    

    ‘what do our feelings say about our fundamental beliefs? I believe that the answer to this question is, “Not necessarily very much.” Our feelings are not a reliable measure of our self-perception. Why? Because automatic thoughts can create feelings that are just as convincing as thoughts that reflect our deeply held beliefs. So, it is vital that we do not reflexively take the thoughts and feelings that our brains send to us at face value.’

    Here Dr Steven Phillipson is highlighting the fact that automatic thoughts can create feelings, these feelings can make things feel more real.  Therefore, we shouldn’t put too much emphasis on how we feel as feeling are NOT within our control. 

    Why would we give up our autonomy (our right to make informed decisions about our lives) to something we have NO control over? (Remember, we cannot control our thoughts and feelings only our behaviours. )

    Another great quote from the article:

    ‘Remember when you have OCD, you cannot use your feelings to determine if a threat is ”real”.  Doing so is a little like asking the Devil for directions to heaven’.

    I always remember this quote when I’m starting to spiral as it happily reminds me that I cannot trust those feelings.

    The article highlights how when one has OCD the amygdala – whose primary function is to process emotions, especially fear and anxiety – is sending us a faulty signal that there is something which needs our attention right away and cannot wait. Our job – through ERP therapy – is to become habituated (the process of making or becoming accustomed or used to something.) to this alert. 

    This is no easy task and can feel very uncomfortable. Choosing to ignore your brains warning system and take the chance that it’s a false alert can truly feel like jumping out of an aeroplane not knowing whether your parachute is packed correctly. However this is the chance we have to take to show the brain that the signal was faulty, we literally do nothing about the thought and carry on with our day aligning with our values.

    More on habituation coming in future posts but for now I’m going to leave you with this motivational mantra which I use all the time,

    ‘Every day is a new opportunity for me to show my brain that this continued prompt is meaning and irrelevant. ‘

    I really hope it helps you too:
    As always, stay strong xxx