Tag: Yoga

Conquering OCD Turns Three!

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So conquering OCD is three years old today and that’s a pretty momentous thing for me.  Thank you to to everyone who follows me I so appreciate your support.  Passing 100 followers towards the end of 2019 was a pretty magical moment for me as it was always a little target I had.

When I started this blog it was mainly to try and share some of the things I’d learnt along my OCD journey.  Things that had helped me in the hope that it would be able to help others too.  Unexpectedly for me it has also turned into a sort of therapy tool, somewhere I have come to process my thoughts, make sense of them, separate myself from them and then turn them into something useful to share with others – wow, I really didn’t see what one coming.

Over the last 18 months I haven’t spent as much time writing posts as I’d have liked, this is for two reasons I think:

  1. A very busy home life
  2. I haven’t been suffering as much with my OCD as I used to, yay!  I’m not a therapist so I don’t like to just preach, I like to have experienced something.  Then I am able to share how I made my way through it and out the other side, then hopefully that can help someone else too.

I have started my yoga teacher training now, which is amazing.  I’m hoping in the future I will be able to share some of the skills and practice I am learning to help deal with calming the mind and relaxation – we definitely all need a bit more of that at the moment.

For now, thanks again and as always,

Stay Strong xxx

Looking after your mental health

Posted in Anxiety, Mental Health, Mental Wellbeing, OCD General, worryTagged , , , , , 1 Comment

So a lot has been happening in the world since I last posted on here.  This is a terribly anxious time for us all regardless of whether you have a mental illness or not but if you are already trying to deal with something then this could be a particularly tough time.

I know a lot of my coping strategies have had to go out of the window recently because of social distancing and isolating and this is difficult.  I know if I look at the news too much or overthink what is going on I start to spiral and so I am doing what I can to stay informed without loosing myself in it all.

Things that have helped me so far:

Limiting News – Just reading headlines once a day – stay informed but don’t consume too much media

Distraction – whatever you enjoy doing (in the house of course), use it to distract yourself from your thoughts.  A few ideas are as follows:  Reading, writing, playing an instrument, watching Netflix, baking, playing with your kids, playing a game, creating, crafting, colouring, yoga, online exercise classes, FaceTime, WhatsApp, zoom, cleaning, gardening.

Mindfulness – This can be really simple things such as: feeling the sun on your skin in the garden, hearing your kids laughing, feeling the ground beneath your feet, bake something and smell the aroma.  Whatever you choose to tune into, do it multiple times a day and really feel and be in that moment.

Meditation – If you can meditate.  I know people find this one hard, I also find it difficult to calve out time for it specifically but I know if you can find the time (and you should) then it will help calm your mind.  Try and find an app or podcast to support you and talk you though the process, this can help to give it some structure and make it feel more achievable.

Move around – I have definitely found I’m not hitting my step count most days but it’s important to try and keep yourself moving so we don’t cause ourselves other issues.  I have some niggling sciatic pain at the moment and I know it’s from the dramatic change in lifestyle.

Yoga –  I would highly recommend Yoga as I personally love it and I’m currently doing my teacher training but if you can carve out some time to do some exercise this is going to boost your mood for sure.

Eating well – It can be very easy to comfort eat at times like this, but try to be mindful of the knock on effect it is going to have on your mental health.  Last week I had to work long hours to fit my work in around looking after my children.  As a result I drank too much coffee and I felt the effects of this for a couple of days.  It’s not always worth the short term fix and this week I will be sticking to my usual one coffee a day.

Look for the positives – Yes it’s a difficult time and at the moment the end is pretty hard to see but try and focus on the positives which are coming out of this situation, sometimes life can be about how you choose to look at it.  For instance, I am getting to spend a lot more time with my family which although at times is hard it’s also completely amazing and an opportunity I will probably never experience again in my lifetime.  There are also environmental benefits coming from the reduction in industry which shouldn’t be overlooked and a feeling of community coming out of people, knowing we are all in this together.

I really hope wherever you are and whatever you are currently facing that you’re all OK.  Now more then ever it is so important to,

Stay Strong xxx

Be afraid and do it anyway

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I am the queen of self sabotage, I seem to enjoy putting myself down, talking myself out of following my dreams and continuing to do things which I know aren’t good for me.
Why do I do these things?  Is it easier not to change and stay in my comfort zone? Am I scared of failure if I try?  Ummm well Yes but then if I don’t try then I’ll never grow or give myself the opportunity to succeed and is that worse?  I’m guessing a lot of us feel this way.
Recently I’ve decided to make a change, I am going to leave my job of 9 years and try for a new career.  Now this has not been an easy decision, I have worked in my current role for a long time and I am very much in my comfort zone.  I work with a great group of people and the work is stimulating enough to keep it interesting (I’m a software developer), I get well paid, have flexibility with being able to work from home and I live close to my office – am I mad to leave?  Well maybe, my mind has definitely been telling me that (got to love the chatter) but I know in my heart that I am never going to love this job and so I am never going to be amazing at it.  I don’t have the enthusiasm for it that I see in some of my work colleagues and I want that passion for something.
So I am starting my Yoga teacher training at the end of this month, Yoga is something I do love and do feel passionate about.  Realistically I won’t be making as much money for a while and so I have had to save and we will have to adapt to living on one income for a while but with my 35th birthday approaching I honestly feel like it’s a bit of a ‘now or never’ moment.
I will be leaving work at the end of May and I would be lying if I said I wasn’t terrified but I truly believe it is the right decision and so I have to block out all the chatter and negative vibes and believe in myself (always a tricky one for me).  The affect all this is going to have on my mental health has been another really scary consideration for me.  Work has always been a very secure anchor in my life and has kept me stable through really hard times but I have to stop my mental health getting in my way and know I am tough enough to do this.
For anyone else thinking about making a similar life changing decision here are a few positive affirmations for you, I know I will be using them a lot in the coming months!
  • It is never too late to be what you might have been
  • If you ever feel like giving up just remember quitting won’t bring you any closer to your dreams
  • Be afraid and do it anyway
  • You’re either fighting for your dreams or fighting for your excuses
  • Just relax nothing is under control
  • The real challenge is to overcome how we view ourselves
  • Just a little progress each day adds up to big results
  • Be obsessed with your own potential
  • If your dreams don’t scare you, they are too small – Richard Branson
  • If you never try then you’ll never know what might have been
  • Believe in yourself, you got this!
As always, Stay Strong xxx

Trying to Find Some Calm

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To be honest I think I’ve stumbled at the first hurdle with this one when I’ve said ‘trying’ to relax.  Surely you’re not fully relaxed if you’re ‘trying’ to be.  Being truly relaxed is something that happens when we don’t even notice and so probably impossible to orchestrate and therefore out of reach for so many of us who want to be able to control everything, argh!!!!

So what can we do to set us towards this state without forcing it?  That is the million dollar question!

I’m going to start with making a list of things I enjoy doing and that I know make me feel calmer and do more of these things:

  • Spending time with my family
  • Being outside
  • Having the house tidy and organised
  • Eating well
  • Exercising – Doing Yoga
  • Watching comedy and laughing

On top of knowing what you enjoy doing having some good coping mechanisms in place is important.  Such as being able to deal with any situation that comes your way in a calm manner, this does take a lot of practice.  It involves being able to adapt and accept that you cannot control everything or everyone around you.  It also means you have to be able to let other peoples shit – which will be sent your way occasionally – wash over you and not effect your calm.  Some people will not be as emotionally mature as you are and that is their issue not yours.

If we don’t want to remove ourselves from society completely then we must find the best ways to deal with the situations life throws at us which we cannot predict, control or change.  Life is a roller coaster, there will be bad days as well as good, sad times as well as happy and if we can try to put a positive slant on every situation then we will be able to cope better.  Even the toughest times in life will teach us something.

Try and eliminate worry from your life, it is completely pointless.  Worrying about a situation doesn’t improve it, change it or help in any way.  If you are worrying about something and there is something you can do to change it then DO IT.  If there is nothing that can be done then you have to just let it go, know what will be will be and get back to living in the moment rather then the past or the future.  Worry really does spoil any calm you might have cultivated so don’t let it!

Write a gratitude list when you’re feeling low and appreciate all the things you have.  Always striving for the next thing and not stopping to appreciate what you already have is never going to bring you happiness and it’s very exhausting.

Life is full on nowadays and it can be difficult to switch off at times but finding the quiet in all the chatter is important for your brain, how can you relax unless you have time to stop for a moment?  Meditation is brilliant for this, unfortunately I think a lot of people hear the word ‘meditation’ and start to tune out, either because they feel they ‘don’t have the time’, or it’s a bit ‘hippie dippie’ for them.  I’ve thought both of these things in the past and I admit I still find it hard to find time to just ‘meditate’ and be with myself.  I manage to attach some mediation to my yoga practice and this feels a bit less intense to me but it can definitely be hard if you’re not a fan of your own company (and many of those suffering with mental illness aren’t) to find time to just be with yourself.

Mindfulness can be a smaller step in this direction and much easier to do immediately, just focus in on anything around you even just your breathing and off you go!

I hope you have a few more ideas on how to help find your calm and be more relaxed now.

As always, Stay Strong xxx

 

Dealing with anxiety

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Over the last year anxiety has become my constant friend, everything seems to trigger it and though I continue to try and push myself to do things – knowing that I have to go through it to get better – it really doesn’t seem to be going anywhere and so I find myself thinking, ‘will it just always be there?‘.

This is a very scary thought but is it a realistic one?  So many things seem to trigger it and so how am I ever going to get to a stage where I can just, not be anxious?  Sometimes I’m not even sure why it’s there at all?  If I’m in a new situation, meeting someone new or in an unfamiliar place I get it but why would I feel anxious when trying to decide what to cook for tea?  Or getting ready to go out for the day or even just walking along the pavement?

Are we all just a bit more anxious nowadays? 

Life is incredibly busy and we do put so much pressure on ourselves to be – or at least appear to be – perfect.  Is social media to blame?  Do we honestly think that everyone else has it ‘sorted’?  Are we afraid of looking weak or less than?  Do we think others will judge us?  Why does it matter if they do?  Or is there just some deep bedded shit from our past that we have to work through?

I’m personally not sure how we are supposed to process this stuff but being aware of it I would guess is the first step.  Ultimately you’re trying to reprogram things that have been ingrained in you for years and this takes a lot of work and being present, you can’t just expect the body to change without being conscious of what it is doing.  So how do we tune into our bodies more?

Yoga

I have recently upped my yoga attendance as I find this practice really helps me tune into my body, I have done yoga for years but more recently it has taken on a new meaning to me.  I used to go for exercise, to increase my flexibility and to help with my sciatic pain but I almost feel like I used to do it mindlessly, just following the instructors commands and not really understanding the affect the postures have on the body.  The meditation at the end I just used to find boring and I didn’t really get the point of it but now I tune into my body and feel it buzzing with energy after a practice, something which has made me cry on more then one occasion!  I am so obsessed with Yoga now that I am doing my teacher training next year and can’t wait to understand more about the practice.  I would highly recommend it to anyone feeling anxious.

Mindfulness

We need to live outside of our heads more and not be consumed by our thoughts. It is far too easy to live mindlessly day to day, our mind actually helps us to live mindlessly by putting our daily activities into routines so we can do things without really thinking about them.  Does this sound familiar:

Get up, eat breakfast, shower, brush teeth, get in car, drive to work, switch PC on, etc, etc

How many new thoughts did you have along the way?  The mind thinks it’s helping you out by taking the thinking out of your repetitive daily activities but actually it’s doing you a disservice as you are mindlessly moving through life.  Try and mix up your morning routine, or any routine if you can.  Drive/walk a different route to work or change what you have for breakfast so you are consciously making decisions and being more mindful.

Meditation

Here’s one that’s supposed to be transformative but to be honest I struggle with this one too!  I will do anything to try and avoid it or ‘not have the time’ for it.  It’s so important to try and tune into your body and notice how you are feeling, this is how we pick up on the little things the body is trying to tell us.  I am going to try harder at this one.

Less sugar and caffeine

Trying to keep your body in equilibrium so it’s not spiking and dipping all day is also really important but again another really tricky one which I’m not great at either, I really do love my coffee.  Maybe moderation and baby steps is the way to look at this one to make it achievable?

Spend less time on your phone and more time in the real world

I probably don’t need to explain this one, we all know we do it and just reducing it maybe before bedtime, during meal times for first thing in the morning will have a positive effect.  Technology is part of life, like food this one is all about moderation and knowing when you’ve been on your phone too long.

Get outside more

Again this one is probably pretty obvious but try your best to spend at least part of your day outside, even if it’s just a walk at lunch time and take some deep breaths while your out there!

Be kind to yourself

Look after yourself and don’t beat yourself up, you’re doing your best and you won’t always get it right but as long as you’re trying that’s all you can ask of yourself.

I’m still working on some of these myself but I’m really hoping my anxiety levels are going to start to improve over the next few months. I think a lot of the time we know what we should be doing but actually making the changes seems hard work,  Just take one step at a time and don’t expect radical changes these things happen slowly, we are trying to change habits which have been formed over a lifetime and that’s going to take some work.

As always,

Stay Strong xxx

Breathing

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So I’ve done Yoga for many years and for anyone who’s done Yoga at all you’ll be aware that there’s normally a bit of meditation involved and some deep breathing and to be honest I normally find this part a bit dull.  I’ve also been on courses where I’ve learnt about the importance of breathing to get through fight or flight and all about the parasympathetic nervous system and the sympathetic nervous system and how to balance them, I’ve learnt about heart math and it’s benefits and I’ve even blogged on here for over two years about how important breathing and mindfulness is but it wasn’t until today whilst listening to a Happy Place podcast with Rebecca Dennis that the impact of my breath on my entire life really hit me.

A good few years ago when I first met my husband he used to say to me quite often:

‘You’re holding your breath again’

Now, I just used to find this ‘pointless’ information annoying but today it REALLY hit me that this is actually the root of all my issues.  This is why yoga and meditation when I do them actually help me A LOT.  I hold my breath literally all the time, I’m doing it NOW, whilst writing this post, I can feel myself doing it!

I honestly think this is going to change my life.  I have been doing my meditations more (admittedly not everyday) but even that is starting to help and I am definitely going to continue with it.

Just stopping now and listening to my breath, its not smooth its not even, I’m surprised I’ve lasted this long to be honest!

I am sure I will need to do some work on what has caused me to hold my breath in this way but at least now I am aware of it and I can move forward.

Hopefully this will help someone else too,

Stay Strong xxx

 

Yoga

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I cannot speak highly enough about yoga, I flipping love it!  I have done it for years just as a hobby really but it’s benefits for me are huge.  It relaxes me, improves my mental head space, it gets me more in tune with my body, it also helps with my Ulcerative Colitis, it strengthens my body and improves my flexibility, the benefits are endless.  If you’re struggling mentally for whatever reason or actually even if you’re not and you’ve never given yoga a go then you should really try it.

More recently I haven’t been doing as much exercise in general (this includes yoga) mainly because of a lack of time and energy (having just had a baby recently) but I am just starting to feel like I can get my head back into it and I have been bringing myself right back to the basics.  It’s amazing how much you can forget, even the small things like how to breath properly and hold your core muscles. The foundations are so important – in everything not just yoga – you have to put in the time and effort at the start to make sure you reap the benefits at the end.  Like with mental health recovery it is a marathon not a sprint but boy is it worth it in the end.